tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post9044019802340905618..comments2008-05-11T10:29:00.145-05:00elfhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16271905313295544312noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-5712332343661530342008-05-11T10:29:00.000-05:002008-05-11T10:29:00.000-05:00Oh, I forgot. In other communities this is much more important than in mine. In mine, we still stick to the old practice that the real job of a mourner in shul is to lead the whole service; if there are two mourners, one leads the service and one says the kaddish; if there are three mourners, one leads the service, one says a kaddish, we add on a second kaddish for the third. If there are four mourners, we even add a third kaddish.<BR/><BR/>And if there are five mourners, we tell the fifth: "Sorry, everything has been assigned already. Try again tomorrow."<BR/><BR/>So, the whole thing is no big deal-- whoever is saying kaddish today may not be doing so tomorrow, and vice versa.Mar Gavrielnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-85952741302627136062008-05-11T10:28:00.000-05:002008-05-11T10:28:00.000-05:00<B>Don't talk during Mourner's Kaddish.</B><BR/><BR/>*YAWN*. That's one of the few places in the service when I can talk-- and I sure do. :-)Mar Gavrielnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-83578544646571170452008-05-07T14:12:00.000-05:002008-05-07T14:12:00.000-05:00I am the master of tactlessness- you know the guy who means well- buy always things like- "with the price of fuel these days you sure could use that life insurance policy"<BR/><BR/>I just wrote a huge post about how much fun I had at this shiva house I went to last week in factheshhttp://www.frumsatire.net/2008/05/04/am-i-supposed-to-have-this-much-fun-at-a-shiva-housenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-9122145575604478102008-04-07T23:27:00.000-05:002008-04-07T23:27:00.000-05:00By "not pissed off," I mean, "not as pissed off as I would be," and/or "not to pissed off to post." I realize that's not the highest standard in the world.katrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09428267916507575555noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-82812504849722718882008-04-07T15:27:00.000-05:002008-04-07T15:27:00.000-05:00Wow. I'm usually at a loss as to what to say to someone in mourning, but I think I'm sensitive enough not to be ridiculous. Usually I say nothing, since I think that's the safest, since you don't know how someone is going to react to you saying "baruch dayan emet" or even anything sympathetic, such as "I'm so sorry." There's nothing good you can say. It's a lose-lose situation.Knitter of shiny thingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10495339297497300925noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-22619926007317096492008-04-06T19:52:00.000-05:002008-04-06T19:52:00.000-05:00<I>When a young person loses an intended life partner, don't say, "well, you're still young," and start pointing out attractive members of the opposite sex.</I><BR/><BR/>@#$%&?!*<BR/><BR/>I'm not sure why this shocks me even more deeply than the others -- possibly because I can't picture <I>any</I> worldview in which it would make sense.<BR/><BR/><BR/>* Does not represent actual swear-word equivalent. There probably aren't any strong enough.fleurdelis28http://www.blogger.com/profile/02941451047389484323noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-92199617094389886472008-04-06T19:29:00.000-05:002008-04-06T19:29:00.000-05:00Revolting but not surprising. oipqejglHard to believe how dense and insensitive people can be.Davidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01526620481874463898noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-54498409569056176002008-04-06T17:13:00.000-05:002008-04-06T17:13:00.000-05:00Thanks. Do I really seem non-pissed-off?elfhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16271905313295544312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-16506762179293513292008-04-06T15:06:00.000-05:002008-04-06T15:06:00.000-05:00A great post, elf. My sentiments exactly. As usual, I applaud you for taking the time to make important points in an articulate and non-pissed-off manner.<BR/> <BR/>And Janet, people certainly did those.katrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09428267916507575555noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6388344.post-22415918101860569282008-04-06T06:30:00.000-05:002008-04-06T06:30:00.000-05:00Yikes, I hope no one did these!Janethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05277908927563794212noreply@blogger.com